For the past 3 years at Cherokee, I have devoted my time (aside from focusing on grades) to running cross country and track. As I am adjusting to the chaos of senior year, I cannot help but feel a sense of calm knowing that through all the hardships, this sport has somehow led me to more opportunities than I could have ever imagined. Do not get it twisted, though; the journey has not been easy. Similarly to many student athletes here, I have struggled through injury, fatigue, mental blockage, and discovering myself/who I want to be in the future when it comes to my continuation of this sport.
Growing up in a competitive family, the idea of not only racing, but winning was something I became fascinated with from an early age. Although there were times throughout my childhood where I did not think I would be a runner forever, because I was not sure if I could really be a winner and compete with my best, I always came back to it. I even did different sports during my childhood to see what else I might be great at, but still, running had a hold of me, and I was holding on to it. Running felt free. It was like an escape from the real world. I did not have to stress about what situations were occurring in my life at the time, because I could just go for a run to ease my mind. I started on the Cherokee Youth Cross Country and Track team when I was 6 years old. I took a break a few years later to play softball because it was another sport I enjoyed. When I eventually made the decision to go back to running in 6th grade, the same coaches who saw my potential before were still there for me and believed that I would do remarkable things on their team if I were committed to. They accepted me back with open arms, teaching me valuable life lessons about what it meant to be a better teammate and athlete. I learned not to focus so hard on trying to be the best but instead working on improving myself and being proud of the things I had already accomplished. I eventually went on after competing in the youth division throughout elementary and middle school to run in high school here at Cherokee.
But at some point, during the transition from middle school to high school running, it started to feel like a burden. I used to be a competitive kid who would do whatever it took to beat whoever it was that I was up against, even if it meant not winning overall but leaving my entire heart on the course. Now, being struck by the pressure of high school and the self-doubt over competing well, I could not perform to the best of my ability because I did not even feel like I was worthy of racing. In my freshman year, I had originally been off to a great start in the cross country season. However, it was unfortunately cut short due to a calf injury I acquired just before the state meet, which my teammates and I qualified for. After not being able to compete for the rest of the season and having to lay off running for multiple weeks, mentally my brain was shutting down when it came to being excited about running again. By the time track season came along, I felt unfit and unprepared for hitting the track. As expected, my track season did not go the best, but I pushed through and still set decent times for myself while running with the same ongoing calf injury.
This injury and self-doubt continued into my sophomore year for cross country and track. I was constantly crying at practice, feeling exhausted most days, and I started taking steps back to try and process if running was something I should keep doing or if it was not worth the pain. This was not the worst part about that year; however, the worst part of all was that I had to put my game face on and restrain my emotions when it came to communicating with my coaches. I was afraid of being honest about my feelings because deep down I knew everyone would tell me the same rehearsed thing, and that was that they had faith in me and my running career. I knew those words of encouragement would not help me get over what I was going through. I had to overcome dealing with my emotions on my own if I was going to turn things around. I had to start trusting myself and my training once I recovered. I had little faith in myself, but even some faith was still something. I started to truly focus on recovery rather than feeling bad for myself, as well as on improving my negative attitude. So, the summer after my sophomore track season, once my injury did lay off for a bit, I worked even harder to get my mileage up. I began consistently strength training so that my body would become stronger and continued doing all I could to recover my calf.
Fast forward to my junior year, I got my first personal record in the 5k since the beginning of my freshman year cross country season, beating my old time of 21:22.30 – to recently getting 21:21.86. It is not much of a PR, but I am still elated to have even beaten my old personal record in the first place, since I had not been able to do it the year prior. Our team gained a new distance coach last year as well, who helped me work on building confidence. She understood my troubles with the injury and mental blocks immediately, which made me feel noticed and cared for. With this newfound strength and confidence, I went into track season with a better mentality. I have since shattered my old 3200m and 1600m PRs, and I look forward to setting more this upcoming senior season. All I needed to gain was confidence in myself and a brighter outlook on running. I can finally recognize the fact that it is possible to have great races even when my body does not feel great, because I have learned my mind will take me farther than my body makes me think I can go. Funnily enough, my coaches have always told me that, too, but I just never wanted to listen because I was so disturbed by the negative things.
As my final seasons of running here at Cherokee approach, I can proudly say I am excited for what the future holds when it comes to my running career. I am so beyond blessed that I get the opportunity to do what I love every day. That is something I will remember not to take for granted anymore. I would not be where I am today without God, family, teammates, coaches, and overall, the support that this sport has provided me with. As I said before, I have dealt with many setbacks in my running journey. However, the accomplishments and relationships have made it all worth the sweat and tears. If you are experiencing those setbacks as an athlete right now, I want to let you know how important it is to keep going, because in the end all of it will lead you to something much greater than whatever it is you are going through.
